"A popped IV, and The 8th Wonder of the World..."

“A popped IV, and the 8th wonder of the world”

Today was the day that they did the mapping, or simulation of the radiation treatment. The 8th wonder of the world, also known as my sister, Janie, accompanied me to the RAD/ONC center today at KU Med. I still have a tough time processing just a year ago everyone in my family who treaded those hallowed KUMC grounds was excited to see my nephew Michael flourish in his medical schooling. Now, we’re there for a life-altering situation. It creates the oddest sensation.

Once I got there, they started an IV and then I sat in the patient waiting room until a young man named Seth, and his med school trainee, Gabby came to get me. I plopped down on the table and they ran me through the CAT scan. They monitor your breathing, and I just simply started counting and controlling my breathing so it would be consistent. I remember looking at the top of the donut shaped monstrosity of a machine I was in the midst of, thinking how fabulous science was. That’s the science nerd in me that allows me to divert my attention away from my situation and process other information as a distraction. I had to lie prone on my back, with my hands gripping two bars above my head. Just imagine lying in bed, and having to have your hands touch the wall behind you. After a brief bit under the whirling motor, they yanked me back out of the giant “cheerio” and put dots under both armpits and on my sternum.

When you’re being mapped, you must remain still. I am still amazed how poised and calm I’ve been through all these tests. At any rate, when they put me back in and administered the IV dye, the motor started again. All of the sudden, I felt gooey, wet stuff on my left hand. My IV popped out, and all the liquid oozed down my hands. With a sense of urgency, I pondered if I should raise my head and tell them, as I never experienced the metallic taste that accompanies these tests, nor felt the warmth through my body. I wondered if this IV popping out would affect their tests and simulation. I finally, after a few seconds, decided to tell them and simply raised my head and said: “My IV popped out.” The radiation student Gabby came out and said the Doctor had seen what he needed to see, wiped up the messy goo, and told me we were almost through. She then proceeded to start marking me with the ink. I asked her if it was like acupuncture and she replied she didn’t know, but would assume so.

I’m finding I’m making myself get out of my house more often. At first, I just wanted to crawl into a hole and make this bad episode of a nightmare disappear. I had a board meeting at my local country club tonight and hadn’t planned to attend. However, about ten minutes prior to the meeting, I decided I needed to make myself go. I’m extremely passionate about golf; it’s my summer therapy. I had a tough time at first walking into the meeting. My dear friend and summer golfing partner Patty Flynn is our bookkeeper at the club, and it was difficult seeing her. I also had a tough time seeing Kathy, another golfing partner and board member. I was surprised I lasted as long as I could during the meeting. I sat through the entire meeting, gave input when I could, and avoided even talking about my situation until the end. Once I gave Patty my update, I suddenly found myself back in my nightmare, and exited the meeting early.

I start Radiation on Tuesday, March 17th, and am unsure when the chemo will begin, but will find that out in the next day or so. The sweetest oncology nurse, Vici, reminded me to wear my green that day. She has the most tender, sweet voice that reassures my frightened soul. When life gives you news that creates doubt and confusion regarding your future, you find comfort in the smallest, strangest things. It’s a different aspect towards life. I’ve always treasured life, and counted my blessings. Nowadays, I continue to see the positives and blessings in life. I just tend to cherish and ponder things a little longer.

I'm blessed I have tons of friends and family reaching out for me. It's helping me to stand tall again.

Love and Prayers,
Julie